I’m so sick of hearing so many negative things about myself every single fucking day, no matter how hard I try to stay positive, from pretty much everybody. I get told jokingly (and repeatedly) how stupid I am and I try to brush it off, except they don’t realize that I hear them mutter it under their breath.
It’s to a point where I don’t even know any positive features about me. I don’t know why I have the friends that I have, or the family members, or just anything. It’s like I’m taking the place of a person who deserves to be in my place. Who’s sweet, and wholesome, and genuinely cares for people that everybody loves. Not the selfish, narcissistic, shitty nuisance that I, myself, am.
I’ll probably hate myself for even posting any of this later, and I’ll probably get so much sympathy that will probably make me hate myself even more, but I guess it’s better to get it out than nothing.
“Hey, we’re just bleeding for nothing.It’s hard to breathe when you’re standing on your own.We’ll kill ourselves to find freedom.You’ll kill yourself to find anything at all.”– Augustana